Anxiously Awaiting

I've had a lot of anxiety lately. As I'm sure every soon-to-be-new-mom has. We are so close to actually meeting this.... person that's been growing in utero these last eight months. So close.

 

I wonder about the physical.  What will she look like? Will she have J's eyes or mine?  Will she have dark hair like me? J was a blond as a babe.  Though truthfully, we all know brand new babies tend to look like little grandpas more than anyone else.

 

I wonder about her personality, too.  The longer I teach children, the more I realize that so much is biological- personality wise, that is.  Will she be like we were as kids?  I think we were both really laid back.  J is type A.  I'm type whatever.  She may be high maintenance.  You never know...

 

 

I wonder about her interests.  We both love art so much.  We giggle about how she'll probably want nothing to do with art when she gets older.  What will she be interested in? What will she want to be when she grows up?

 

I have this fear that I won't be able to take care of a baby.  Like basic needs.  I've had a recurring dream lately where my little calico cat packs up her bags and leaves because I forget to feed her.  Yes, it's actually a dream where a cat packs up a little hobo bag.  You know, a bandanna tied to a stick.  It sounds funny (it is), but I wake up really distressed.

I worry about being a good parent.  Teaching her to be a good person.  Teaching her right from wrong.  Teaching her to care for others.  Setting a good example.  Being patient and kind.  I especially worry about being patient after working a full day at an elementary school. 

  

Being a working mom weighs on my conscience, too.  But that's topic for another day.  Or not, I know it's a touchy subject.

 

But now I'm getting ahead of myself.  She'll be here before we know it.  Even with all my anxiety, I'm pretty confident we can cover her basic needs.  I mean, I think we can.  We should have no problem feeding her.  And sheltering her.   And God knows I can clothe her.  Hehehe...

 

That is the point of this post, in case you were wondering.  I sat down the other weekend and went a little nuts making some baby clothes.  With a little help from Winifred Aldrich's Metric Pattern Cutting for Children's Wear and Baby Wear and a few baby patterns I own,  I made a little bodice pattern.  It either snaps at the shoulders or ties.  All of these outfits are sized for around three months, though I suspect they will fit more around six months.  She should be able to wear them this summer.

 

This outfit is made from leftover fabric from previous projects.  How fun is it that baby things take so little fabric?  Glad I saved all my scraps.  The little pantaloons came from a McCall's pattern.

 

This dress is my favorite.  The striped fabric began life as a cowgirl shirt complete with purple pearl snaps.  I tried to salvage the snaps but couldn't.  The bloomers and lining came from a favorite linen skirt that I can no longer wear.  The linen is worn and soft and the most wonderful faded peach color.  It was serendipitous that it matched the shirt so well.  Does anyone else save old clothes because they love the fabric so much?  I have a bucket full of old things I can't bear to giveaway because I want to re-purpose the fabric.  It was fun to dig though my bucket and put some things to use.

 

  

Like this last little dress.  It was an embroidered airy tunic I never wore.  It looks better as a pretty little sundress anyway.  Sewing little bitty things is so satisfying.

  I'll continue to focus on the clothing part of taking care of a baby.  It seems to help the anxiety a bit.  We'll figure out the rest later....