My drive to work has been extremely difficult these past two days.
Cheerless, at a time of year when it should be full of cheer.
I can't wrap my head around it. I just can't fathom it. I know what happened on Friday was hundreds of miles away- not that it matters. But it doesn't feel that way.
I know those hallways, those vinyl floors, those cinder block walls.
I know what it sounds like, what it smells like, what it looks like.
I know those teachers and staff.
I know those children.
At least I feel like I do.
My heart just aches.
The funny thing is, once I get to work the kids cheer me up. I know it's my job to teach and guide and counsel my students. But sometimes I feel like the tables are turned. And I am the one who is being comforted.
It's a pretty amazing job. I don't ever want to forget that.
I have also found comfort in prayer. I am praying for the families who lost and praying for those who survived. I am praying for the school and its faculty. And I'm praying for change. Big change.
This is not meant to be a political post. Just contemplative. Writing this post was therapeutic. I didn't feel like I could write the post about some crafty Christmas nonsense I had planned to write this week.
I hope we can all find our way forward.